August 29th, 2007
What’s your problem
What the heck is your problem? I already said I wasn’t free and you all were fine with it. Now, you’re kicking up a big fuss. So, what, at that time you were in a jolly mood so it was okay, and now you’re not - and trying to get rid of mine - and so you make it sound like it’s my bloody fault. Heck, I already said I’d get my own transport if you all want to go. SO GO! WTH do you have to go and ask whether I HAVE to go: YES I DO because I’ve got a part to play. And what’s with smirk and sarcasm when I explained why I had to - you can’t believe it, you think I can’t do it? Your damn annoying tone pissed me off so badly. I was patiently answering you know why? Because you’re just going to say why I’m being rude. I wished I could just tell you that you’re freaking rude, and probably that’s WHY I am. You talk to her so nicely and then when it comes to me, I’m like .. wth man. And it’s so annoying to hear her speak in that pampered tone, knowing that if I do it, I’ll just down-right get a firing. So yea, I have holidays and I don’t plan to get it ruined. Can’t I just enjoy? It’s not like I’m going out everyday - heck I’ve not even gone out yet. It’s not like I go spend hundreds of dollars - I don’t even spend more than 10 most of the time! If I’m such a bother, then why bother? JUST go with your plan and I’ll just find my way. But you can’t even confirm so how the hell am I supposed to find transport? I can’t possibly go asking my friend then end up on that day (AGAIN) you guys happily decide, “Oh, we’re not going anymore..” And you don’t even remember what I said: I probably can find transport for the next week, NOT this week. It wasn’t me who said that oh, we’re most probably not going. Now, I’m flaring up everything here because I don’t have anyone to talk to here. I don’t want to tell my friends because they won’t know how to respond and because of that, their replies may make me mad at them.
My day was fine, thank you, but now is damn ruined. It’ll probably get better after I sleep on this or just.. avoid talking to them for the rest of the time. I didn’t mention who I’m talking about but I think you all probably would have guessed.
I’m fine though. I think my anger has left with the words up there. Ah, I didn’t know blogging was so useful..
To Rilla: Thanks for your comment(s). You’re always like the first (or probably the only one) to comment on my blogs. Thank you, really. 
And referring to your comment, I think that friends would probably feel awkward and won’t know how to respond. And somehow, I feel like I’ll burden them. Not that they don’t listen or they don’t care - they do but at times their choice of words make things worse. I have good friends and maybe that’s why I don’t want to, you know, trouble them with my problems. (Though I know, they’ll insist it’s not a problem at all; if I were in their shoes, I would want my friends to feel like they can talk to me too). Oh well.
Was that… you mum? Unfortunately, it reminds me of something that I experienced before as well. I bought the ticket for a school show with my parents’ consent, but the day before the show they told me to cancel it completely because they’re busy and no one’s going to take me. I can get my own transport, thanks. But still, no. I hate it when people that have authority over you get emo and ruin your day, completely.
You’re welcome.
I didn’t think I would burden my friends. They usually just don’t say the right words that less-close friends say. They probably would care about me but the words they say don’t make me feel that way I suppose. I wonder why though? I’m not good with comforting close friends either. I’m just more of an action > words person. Big hug or two, but totally stuck for words.
Well its true that we may not always have the best choices of words to help out with the situation many a times. Even now I’m not too sure what should be said. Was never really good at it anyways. But I’m sure it wouldn’t prove to be a burden. You’ve got friends who care. Its a good thing. Whatever the case, just try to cheer up from it all, though you’d probably know that already. All the best.
OMG thats a huge rant in one paragraph there. Cheer up, these things happen, and I’m sure the best will come out.
Burden them? Yeah I feel that way too so sometimes I keep everything to the blog where I can express myself. Sometimes close friends say the wrong things that makes things worse, and you can get so glum you wish you’d just die (in my case :P)
btw, thanks for the early greeting in Friendster =)
Awww, that sound harsh but it happens. I hate it when I have to get somewhere and I’ve got everything planned out and then something gets all messed up. Cheer up though, I’m sure you’ll find transport, don’t cancel and just try to have fun when you do go. =)